It is now around 9pm on March 3, 2012. 10 whole days of absolutely no contact through "my precious" Facebook! The first few days were SO EASY! But then things happened, funny things were said, TV shows were watched. awards shows were watched, I got pissed off, I got happy, friends came and unfortunately one of my closest went. All of these were worthy of a Facebook post, a cyber memo that will be forever a memory to us, and for those in the future a gram of history from days past.
Monday... Monday is definitely when the Facebook withdrawal kicked in. I had SO MANY things I wanted to post! It seemed that every time I blinked I seen or heard something completely Facebook worthy! I tried to soothe the withdrawals by signing up with Pinterest... ummmm.... what the fuck is the point of that site? I mean sure, I have gotten some awesome ideas and recipes from there but honestly, I aint ever gonna do that shit! And neither is 85% of the rest of us "pinners". So my sister Chrystal says, "start a Twitter". OK, what a good idea! Until you find out that Twitter is only utilized by celebrities, reality TV, and wannabees. I could not find not a single friend on Twitter that I could follow. I spent more time tweeting at #Drag Race reading those ugly chewbacca booger pseudo drag queens they have on Season 4 of Ru Paul's Drag Race! OK OK big props to Chad Michaels, Latrice Royale and (mi favorito) Sharon Needles, them bitches are WURRRKKKKT!
So I have came up with a MASTER PLAN! I totally do not want 40 days missing from my Facebook timeline, I use that as my diary!! What I am going to do is utilize this FABULOUS blog I have! Every time I get the itch to update the Facebook status for whatever reason it may be I am just gonna update my blog! I do have some things I need to say about the prior 10 days before starting this so I will just catch you all up to speed in the next paragraph. I promise from here on out I will be more grammatically and writing 101 correct.
February 22nd Ash Wednesday didn't do a damn thing except uninstall the Facebook app from my Droid and cleared it out of my history on the laptop. Thursday? Hmmm. Nada. Friday I volunteered to wetback for my cousin Christina, I mowed her lawn, planted some flowers, and finally took off the Christmas icicle lights off her front porch that she hung up two years ago. Then I packed up and Chrystal and myself went to H-Town where we stayed at Red Roof Inn, they call it Red Roof Inn because the roof is the only place not covered in blood or other miscellaneous types of DNA. Eww. Come Saturday morning I had a working interview at a restaurant, I loved it! I caught on to the operations of the store very quickly, they only had to show me once how to complete a certain job, and I even showed that stores General Manager how to ring up multiple items without entering them in 1 by 1. The entire staff liked me and I really liked them. I was there a good three hours and then it was back on the road to wonderful Central Texas. We arrived in the "Square" to pick up Diesel the dog and I ended up spending the night with my Tia Gladys. They brought me home Sunday and I spent the evening watching the Oscars. Monday, nothing, well except for one FANTASTIC episode of "Smash". Tuesday, nothing. Wednesday, sister took me to Souper Salad for supper and for even more excitement we stopped at HEB to get dog food, creamer, sugar, and candy! Ooooh fun! Friday... want the good or the bad news first? Well? Alright I will choose. The good news - I got 2 more job interviews next week! These will make interview numbers 9,784 and 9,785! I think I could be shooting for a Guinness record! I have not been employed not a single day in 2012, but believe me I have the proof that I have been trying every single muthafuckn day! So now the bad news...
I don't have many close close friends here. The ones that I do have, I consider family. If you have known someone since before you/they were off the tit, you remember their childhood birthday parties, what their Mom used to scream when it was time to get in the house, the first time we were allowed to take the car out riding, the first time we got high together, or the time your "actual biological" cousin threw a brick at your other cousins car over a wore out dookie nose stained high school boy they were both dating... then the classification of "Family" is an UNDERSTATEMENT!
I lost this family member Friday March 2nd, 2012. I had spoken to her a couple days earlier making plans to go buy flowers so that I could hook up the flower bed in the front yard of her house. We were going to do that today. Samantha Neumann has been a loyal ride or die friend since as far as I can remember. Nobody could make me laugh like she could. If you had a problem, she had the answer, if she didnt have the answer, well she knew someone who did! Very few people have ever "shot from the hip" with me, I usually attract the flakes and the "yeah yeah cliques", but with Sam you always knew where she stood. Not afraid to tell you how she felt, why she felt that way, and why you were wrong! A good hearted friend she was to me and I am going to miss her so much. One thing I know is I will never forget the sayings and shit that would come out her mouth! One of the quickest and downright funniest girls I have ever had the pleasure of having in my life.
"Get off da gas hoe!" "Whassup unda dare? Whassup unda dare??" "Dis bitch tryin to get got comin at me all sideways n shit, Imma bout to knock dat hoe cockeyed and knock kneed!"
It's time to lay it down Samantha, I love you and I promise to be there for Susie and Cash whenever they call, as you always were for me. Rest in peace my cousin, my friend.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
So guys from here I will resist the Facebook urge and update this blog instead of my status. Just so you know I can SHARE this blog on Facebook without actually getting on Facebook. So dont be coming at me sideways when I send a link/post to the news feed, I wasnt logged in!!
No comments:
Post a Comment